


The Kind Of Love I Can't Return (But I'm Gonna Borrow)

by AnotherGallavichLove



Series: Prompts [67]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Cheating, Crying, Getting Back Together, M/M, post 5x12
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2015-12-28
Packaged: 2018-05-10 00:30:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5561860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnotherGallavichLove/pseuds/AnotherGallavichLove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on this prompt: Ian dreams that a year from the break up with Mickey, his family tells him that Mickey is going to married. Ian wakes up terrified of the idea of Mickey with another guy and he will go immediately to his house for make peace.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Kind Of Love I Can't Return (But I'm Gonna Borrow)

**Author's Note:**

> I reversed the roles, and I also made a couple of other small changes. Mostly because I had this idea, and it pretty easily went hand in hand with this prompt, so I used it. I hope that's okay with the anon who sent me this. 
> 
> Also, listen to Borrowing by Halsey (then going by Ashley Frangipane) while reading this. Just... just do it.

_As soon as Mickey entered the house, he was met by his sister, quite obviously waiting for him in the darkness, a beer next to her on the table._

 

_”Hey, what’s up?” He asked, running a hand over his hair, slightly damp from the snow falling. Many sighed, gnawing slightly on her bottom lip as she stood up from the chair and took a couple of steps forwards. ”You’re freaking me out” He said through a chuckle, but her frown didn’t let up a bit. ”The fuck’s the matter?” His face soon mirrored hers as his stomach started stirring in the worst way._

 

_”Mick… I was talking to Fiona” Mickey frowned harder._

 

_”Something happen to Ian?” Why the fuck did he care? That was a question he’d probably never know the answer to, but he did. A year and a half after the breakup, he cared. Mandy lightly shook her head, though._

 

_”No, he’s fine, but um… He’s getting married, bro. I thought you might want to know”_

 

_Mickey froze, his throat tightening at the words. His eyes were on his sister’s but his mind was anywhere but. All he could see was Ian, standing at an altar, holding hands with some random jackass, promising to have and to hold and all that shit._

 

_Mickey swallowed, forcing his tears back. He had no fucking right to be upset, not really. He may still be in love with Ian - something he usually did his best to forget about. But that didn’t mean that Ian felt the same or that there was any point in sulking over him getting married._

 

_”Why um… why are you fucking telling me this?” Mickey asked, even though they both knew._

 

_”Mick…” She just said, and Mickey’s eyes fell shut._

 

_Pictures flashed past his eyes. Not of Ian and him, but of Ian and some other guy. Kissing, laughing, smiling, fucking. Touching._

 

_”Mickey, are you gonna be okay?” Mandy asked, her voice wavering as Mickey felt tears trailing down his cheek, two or three at a time, coating the skin._

 

  
”Fuck” Mickey cursed out loud, his body being ripped out of the nightmare as he immediately sat up, his eyes slowly getting used to the dark room.

 

His eyes were wet. Apparently he had actually been crying. His skin was coated in a thin layer of sweat, his heart banging against his ribcage so hard that he was actually scared that one would end up snapping.

 

His black bed hair was messed up, all over the place as he had gone to bed with it wet.

 

When he finally realized that it was a dream, that Ian wasn’t getting married, he calmed down slightly, his heart slowing down. He let out a small, sad, overwhelmed chuckle.

 

That was until he realized that even though Ian wasn’t getting married, that didn’t change the fact that they were broken up. They had been for almost six months by now. Ian wasn’t with him, they weren’t sleeping next to each other and no drugs, no alcohol and no other cocks would ever be able to fill that hole in his chest.

 

Mickey wasn’t sure how it happened, his brain wasn’t really in the equation as his body got out of the bed and his sweatpants were pulled onto his legs. He moved across the house, and stepped into his shoes before he exited the Milkovich house, out into the dark night, the snow gnarring under his feet.

 

Mickey couldn’t see much, a couple of the streetlights were out, but he knew exactly where the Gallagher house was, so he just kept walking.

 

His heart was still thrumming in his chest as his legs moved. His eyes were stinging with the drying tears.

 

Mickey wasn’t quite sure about what or why he was doing this, his mind was hazy, but it was as if one single thing was in focus.

 

Ian.

 

He knew that it was stupid, childish and clingy as fuck, but he needed Ian. He didn’t know how or in what way, he just knew that he needed him. Right now, and nobody and nothing else would be able to be enough.

 

Mickey’s heart was full on banging against his ribs as he ran up the wooden steps and let his fist rap against the wooden door.

 

The cold air was biting his cheeks and his arms since he hadn’t really been conscious enough to get a jacket on before leaving the house.

 

Thankfully, the person opening the door wasn’t anyone other than Ian. Mickey’s breath caught in his throat. He hadn’t seen Ian in over three months, they hadn’t been this close in six.

 

Ian’s brows furrowed, and Mickey’s eyes stuck to his eyes. That single piece of hair was hanging down over his eyes, it didn’t look as if it had been caught since the last time they had seen each other. He looked healthier, though.

 

Mandy and Debbie were somewhat friends, so Mickey had heard that Ian was on meds now, apparently doing a fuck of a lot better.

 

”Mickey? It’s two am, what are you doing here?” Ian sighed. He didn’t seem or sound angry or annoyed, just confused. Tired.

 

”I…” Mickey started. He hadn’t thought this part through at all, his body had just moved, running on need. ”I need you”

 

Ian frowned harder.

 

”What?”

 

Mickey fought back his tears and pushed his pride and common sense straight out the window.

 

”I need you” He said again. ”Please, I just… I need” Ian sighed, his face softening. He ran a hand over the back of his neck and through his red hair, looking back into the house for a second.

 

”Mickey, I’m not… I mean, I have… someone” Mickey nodded. He knew.

 

Ian had a boyfriend, the one thing that awful dream had gotten right. Fucking Simon, the british royal jackass. Mickey had seen him a couple of times around town. Simon was everything Mickey wasn’t. Tall. Approachable. Blond.

 

”Ian…” Mickey’s tongue darted out to wet his lips as he took a step closer, his fingers slipping onto the collar of Ian’s green tank top.

 

”You look cold” Ian observed, and Mickey knew him well enough to see that he was fighting to make sure he didn’t lean into the touch as Mickey’s finger tips touched his pale skin.

 

Mickey nodded.

 

”I am” He admitted. His head had been slightly dipped, eyes focused on Ian’s shirt and collar bones, but now he lifted it, eyes connecting with Ian’s. ”But just… Just tonight, Ian” He sighed, closing his eyes, tugging at the green collar slightly, their foreheads falling together. ”Forget about everything, just… just tonight” Ian sighed heavily, his eyes closing as well. Mickey’s soft smell filled his nose. ”Please” Mickey whispered, his fingers curling further into the green fabric, tugging Ian even closer.

 

He didn’t want to talk about their relationship, he wasn’t going to force Ian to break up with fucking Simon. All he wanted was tonight, all he needed was to borrow Ian, just for a second. Just to pretend.

 

”Please” He spoke softly again. ”Just… just…”

 

Ian sighed, claiming Mickey’s lips in between his own, successfully shutting him up. Mickey clenched his eyes shut. letting go of Ian’s collar to slip his hands around his neck, leaning into the kiss.

 

Suddenly, it was as if he was back to the person he used to be. It wasn’t healthy, he knew that, but Ian was nothing short of a drug to him.

 

The way his lips worked against his own, the way his warm hands slipped around him, resting on the small of his back, the touch somehow making everything better.

 

Ian’s warm tongue licked across Mickey’s lips, and Mickey parted them, letting him in, both of them tangling together.

 

”Fuck” Mickey sighed into his mouth when they pulled apart.

 

”Yeah” Ian agreed, and their eyes opened as they tilted their heads back a little bit to be able to look at each other. ”Tonight?” Mickey nodded.

 

”Tonight” Ian nodded as well and let go of Mickey, disappearing for a second and coming back, pulling a pair of shoes onto his feet. ”Your place? ’Cause Simon’s - ”

 

”I don’t wanna know” Mickey said, the statement coming out harsh. Ian didn’t blame him for it, though. He knew.

 

  
As soon as Mickey’s bedroom door was closed and blocked behind them, their lips connected again, Mickey’s heart starting to bang against his ribcage again - this time, for all the right reasons.

 

Their shirts were peeled off, thrown to the side, and soon, their chests were pressed against each other, the freezing cold skin molding into a hot mash.

 

One of Ian’s arms were wrapped all the way around Mickey’s waist, holding him as close as he possibly could. His other hand was on the back of his neck, tugging slightly at the black hair.

 

”Fuck, I missed you” He groaned into Mickey’s mouth. Mickey could do nothing but hum in agreement, his body in too much of a high gear.

 

He fell back onto the bed, and Ian climbed on top of him, his hands on the mattress right next to his shoulders to steady himself as they kept devouring each others mouths.

 

Mickey’s fingers were wound into the red hair, tugging, pulling. Ian moaned at the feeling.

 

He then pulled away from the makeout session with one, final, searing kiss before he straightened his back, straddling Mickey’s thighs, pushing his pants down a little bit at a time before he could finally get them off completely, throwing them away to join their shirts on the floor.

 

Mickey sighed as the sight of Ian’s full blown erection after so long. A steady drop of precome was dripping down the tip, heading towards the shaft.

 

”Fucking perfect” Ian smiled softly at Mickey’s obviously accidentally uttered words. He laid down a little bit more and pushed Mickey’s sweats down as well, along with his boxers, leaving them both completely naked.

 

”I missed you” Mickey wasn’t given a chance to reply before Ian was covering his lips with his own again, pushing most of their thoughts right out the window.

 

His legs spread before wrapping around Ian’s hips, grinding their cocks together. Ian groaned into his mouth, their tongues tangling together.

 

Mickey’s arms wrapped around Ian’s neck again, their lips nipping at each others before they went in for more.

 

Ian sighed, grinding down extra hard, creating more friction that could be trapped between the two of them.

 

”Lube still in the drawer?” He asked breathlessly into Mickey’s mouth, who nodded. Their lips parted, and Mickey attached his to Ian’s jawline as he looked for the lube.

 

Mickey’s action would surely leave a heavy hickey, but neither of them thought about it, and even if they had, they probably wouldn’t have given much of a fuck. Not now.

 

Mickey’s heels fell off of Ian’s ass and landed on the mattress as a slick finger circles his puckered hole. Ian pushed his face out of his neck and crashed their lips together again, right as he eased it inside.

 

He swallowed every single one of Mickey’s moans, drinking in the feeling of finally being this close to him again, of making him feel this good.

 

Ian deepened the kiss, head spinning with how fucking tight Mickey felt, even just around his finger. He lazily fucked Mickey with that one finger, not in too much of a rush to get anywhere. A part of him liked this more than anything else.

 

Just being in bed with Mickey, fingering him, making him feel good and kissing. He had missed this man so fucking much, he just hadn’t had the balls to acknowledge it until just now. Fuck if he knew what had gotten Mickey to come over and beg him for the night, but he loved him for it. Among other things.

 

Ian added another finger, scissoring them a little bit, pressing against Mickey’s inner walls. Mickey kept groaning against his lips, eyes clenched shut in pleasure, fingertips digging into the pale skin of Ian’s shoulder blades.

  
”Do it” Mickey sighed after a bit, and that was all Ian needed. He pressed a last, deep kiss to Mickey’s lips and then reached for a condom, ripping it open and carefully rolling it onto himself before getting some more lube and slicking himself up.

 

Mickey spread his legs further, and Ian laid down, their chests pressing together again as the tip of his cock kissed Mickey’s hole.

 

”You good?” Ian asked, their lips dangerously close. Mickey nodded, wrapping his legs back around Ian’s body, silently urging him on.

 

With that, Ian claimed his lips and pressed inside, having to stop every couple of seconds to catch his breath at how fucking tight Mickey actually was around him. It was almost to the point where it stung as they throbbed against each other, struggling to get used to being connected like this again.

 

Mickey’s fingers tips were still dug into Ian’s back, their lips resting against each other as Ian finally bottomed out.

 

”I love you” Ian couldn’t help it, and the quietly sighed words reached Mickey’s ears. He didn’t say anything, and Ian pulled out, rocking back into him. Hard, but not too fast. ”I’m so sorry for everything, baby. I fucking love you”

 

Mickey’s grip on Ian tightened, his eyes stinging with tears as his heart throbbed, both at the words and at the perfect way that Ian was making love to him.

 

Ian kept rolling his hips, their lips resting together, eyes closed. Soon, though, Ian lifted his head and buried his face in Mickey’s neck again, whispering the words over again.

 

”I’m so sorry, baby” Mickey’s heels dug into his ass, and he started lifting his hips slightly to meet his movements. ”I’m so, so sorry, baby” Ian’s voice spoke again, rough. Mickey could feel the wetness on his skin. Ian was crying.

 

Mickey’s eyes clenched shut further as they kept rocking into each other, melting together.

 

”I just want you” Ian sighed. ”I’m so sorry for everything. I just want you. My perfect baby”

 

That was it, Mickey started crying as well.

 

”My baby” Ian kept whispering into his ear, his voice quiet as the tip of his cock managed to brush against Mickey’s prostate.

 

”Fuck” Mickey hiccuped at the immense pleasure. He didn’t know if it was happy tears or sad years, but he had a feeling that it was both, the pleasure pumping through his veins just making the feelings all the more amplified.

 

”I love you” Ian’s gravely voice spoke. ”So, so much. My baby. Mine” All four of Mickey’s limbs tightened around his body as they both felt themselves grow closer to the edge.

 

”I love you too, fuck” Mickey sighed, and as soon as Ian’s hand wrapped around his cock to jerk him off, he came, hot spurts coating their stomachs.

 

Ian lifted his head, their lips colliding again. Then he was there, too, staying buried inside of Mickey as he filled the condom.

 

When they were both finished, he collapsed completely on top of Mickey, their chests glued together with Mickey’s come.

 

  
”So” Ian sighed, their lips slightly parted by now, their foreheads touching, eyes closed. ”We’re… You and me?” Mickey swallowed.

 

”We just cried and fucked at the same time. We’re fucking pathetic, man” Ian chuckled.

 

”The worst” Ian agreed, joining in for a beat before they both grew serious again.

 

”What about…?” Mickey didn’t finished the sentence, he couldn’t.

 

”Fuck him” Ian said easily, and lifted his head. Both pairs of eyes fluttered open, connecting with each other’s. ”I’m yours, Mick. I’ve been since I was fucking sixteen” He said the last part with a small chuckle, and Mickey couldn’t help but mirror his smile, his hands slipping down to rest on Ian’s ass.

 

Ian grinned down at him.

 

”Mine, huh?” Ian nodded, dipping his head, teasingly brushing his lips over Mickey’s, his hand coming up to wipe a drying tear off of his cheek.

 

”Always” Mickey sighed contentedly at the words. 

 

”Always”


End file.
